Tag: humor
group name: fluffinnpuffin
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August 27, 2008 05:21 AM EDT --
Although these seem to apply mostly to men, a few of these have already crept into my life..... and I'm just slightly north of 50. Read 'em and don't weep.....have . . . more
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March 17, 2008 12:15 AM EDT --
A woman in a hot air balloon realized she was lost. She lowered her altitude and spotted a man in a boat below. She shouted to him, "Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet . . . more
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March 13, 2008 08:55 PM EDT --
A stingy old lawyer who had been diagnosed with a terminal illness was determined to prove wrong the old saying, "You can't take it with you."
After much thought and consideration, . . . more
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March 13, 2008 09:11 PM EDT --
LOOKING GOOD
My face in the mirror isn't wrinkled or drawn.
My house isn't dirty. The cobwebs are gone.
My garden looks lovely and so does my lawn.
I think I might never put . . . more
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March 14, 2008 10:42 PM EDT --
Tony had just finished his training session at the local McDonald's.
So he was a little nervous being behind the register for the first time. His first customer ordered a milkshake.
"Tony," . . . more
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March 18, 2008 09:53 PM EDT --
A new supermarket opened near my house. It has an automatic water mister to keep the produce fresh. Just before it goes on, you hear the sound of distant thunder and the smell of fresh rain.
When . . . more
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March 28, 2008 12:11 AM EDT --
A woman was in a gambling casino for the first time.
At the roulette wheel, she says, "I have no idea what number to play."
A young, good-looking man nearby suggests she play her . . . more
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April 01, 2008 12:34 AM EDT --
I was on vacation, playing the slot machines. It was my first time in a casino, and I wasn't sure how the machines operated.
"Excuse me," I said to a casino employee. "How does . . . more
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July 11, 2008 12:40 AM EDT --
Convinced the human race is totally wacko? Here are some signs of the times in support of such a view. An example is the hotel-provided shower cap in a box labeled: "Fits one head."
Others . . . more
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August 27, 2008 05:30 PM EDT --
Allow me to introduce a very valuable, hardworking member of my creative team! As you can see, he is very small.
Despite his small stature, Tot is industrious and likes nothing better . . . more
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March 06, 2008 02:58 AM EST --
A second grader came home from school and said to her grandmother, 'Grandma, guess what? We learned how to make babies today.' The grandmother, more than a little surprised, tried to keep her . . . more
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March 06, 2008 02:53 AM EST --
In Kingsville, Texas, there is a law against two pigs having sex on the city's airport property.
It is illegal for hens to lay eggs before 8 a.m. and after 4 p.m. in Norfolk, Virginia.
. . . more
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March 13, 2008 08:47 PM EDT --
It was a Ladies Only Night in the All Blonde Bingo Hall. The night had been pretty boring, not one single person had a BINGO all night.
The last game was up for grabs, with a huge bingo prize of . . . more
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March 13, 2008 08:52 PM EDT --
During a taxi run, the crew of a U.S. Air flight to Ft. Lauderdale made a wrong turn and came nose to nose with a United 727.
The irate ground controller (a female) screamed, "U.S. Air 2771, . . . more
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March 21, 2008 02:18 PM EDT --
My teenager was headed to school one morning when I told him that the neck tag on his shirt was hanging out.
"I know," he replied. "It's a fad me and some of the guys started." . . . more
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January 08, 2008 05:04 PM EST --
A Baptist Preacher was seated next to a cowboy on a flight to Texas .
After the plane took off, the cowboy asked the flight attendant for a whiskey and soda, which was brought and placed before him. . . . more
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March 14, 2008 01:58 AM EDT --
An elderly looking gentleman, (mid nineties) very well dressed, hair well groomed, great looking suit, flower in his lapel, smelling slightly of a good after shave, presenting a well-looked-after image, . . . more
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March 12, 2008 07:53 PM EDT --
When you buy anything secondhand, make sure you have everything to make it go.
A small boy was pushing a gasoline-powered lawn mower down the street with a "For Sale" sign on it. As he . . . more
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April 03, 2008 06:09 AM EDT --
I slid the glass door open and called, "Hey, anybody here?"
"No one but us old farts!" Jack replied. "C'mon in, get a drink."
That's how our . . . more
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May 15, 2008 10:44 PM EDT --
These are actual stories that they've lived to tell.
I had someone ask for an aisle seat so that their hair wouldn't get messed up by being near the window.
A client called in inquiring . . . more
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